Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Da Vinci Code, Schlaminski Code
Jesus in Japan, England, Kashmir and America?

Only a hack New-Age writer would put Jesus in France. After all, other than pretentious, self-absorbed Hollywood creeps... who would want to move to France?

But anyhow, here's an informative (and fun) article from our good friends Down Under who touch on some of the more interesting "Jesus Slept Here" legends.

Here's a neat one from Japan;

Followers of this modest religious group, apparently of Shinto-Christian origins, believe that the Saviour “escaped” from Palestine and traveled, via the former Soviet Union, to northern Japan. Here Christ married a Japanese woman and lived to the age of 102. In a small town in Aomori prefecture, there are two burial mounds said to be the graves of Jesus Christ and his Japanese wife.

Then we have The Savior hangin' out in England and Wales, undoubtedly ready to leave post-haste due to the horrid food. "Shall I boil your beef for you s'more, Guvnah? Were the jellied eels to your liking, Yer Lordship?"

From there, we have a lovely story of The Lord, The Holy Mother and St Thomas making their way to Kashmir. Possibly this is where Zep got their inspiration for the song of that same name? [side note: Jimmy Page is officially a Rock 'N Roll Judas after he teamed up with Sean P-Diddy Puffy Heinz Kerry Rodham Clinton Combs on that blasphemous version of Kashmir. Was the 30 pieces of silver worth it, Jimmy?]

And lets not forget those fun loving, toothsome, All-American, gods-in-the-larval-stage Mormons. Yeah, we all know about Jesus making a pit stop in upstate New York. Hey... I know Jews love going to the Catskills, but this is ridiculous!


Blogger Michael Barber said...

Don't forget the real reason people tried to spread rumors about Jesus settling in their country and being married to a local person - it was a means to secure royal claims. I should be king because Jesus, the true King, is my great, great, great grandfather. Look at any of these historical fabrications and you'll find deep political motivations involved.

12:02 PM  

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