Saturday, May 05, 2007

Movie Quotes That Every Caveman Should Have Memorized
And most of you already do!

"A little religious communication might not be a bad idea at this stage of the game. Now myself, I don't take any chances, I talk to Mohammed, Buddha, Mr. Jesus H. Christ Himself and any other religious honchos I can come up with." ~ Sgt. Maj. Hafner (R. Lee Ermey) as he tells what's left of his unit that they are surrounded (and heavily outnumbered) by a North Vietnamese Army regiment in The Siege of Firebase Gloria.

"...and who taught you to be playin' patty fingers in the Holy Water!?" ~ Michaleen Oge Flynn (Barry Fitzgerald) in The Quiet Man.

"I want to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill." ~ Private Joker (Matthew Modine) in Full Metal Jacket.

"Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk" ~ Curly Howard in every Three Stooges film.

"I've come to kick ass and chew bubble gum... and I'm all out of bubble gum." ~ Nada (Roddy Piper) in They Live.

"I TOLD you not to make that last payment!" Oliver Hardy yelling at (and hitting with his hat) poor Stan Laurel after they both watch their Model T collapse into many, many pieces before their very eyes in The Stolen Jools.

"And Shepherds we shall be for Thee, my Lord, for Thee. Power hath descended forth from Thy hand. Our feet may swiftly carry out Thy commands. So we shall flow a river forth to Thee. And teeming with souls shall it ever be. In Nomine Patris, Et Filii, [guns cock] Spiritus Sancti. [they open fire]" ~ The brothers Connor and Murphy MacManus (Sean Patrick Flanery and Norman Reedus) in Boondock Saints.

"I am gonna hit you with so many rights, you're gonna beg for a left." ~ Matt Hunter (Chuck Norris) in Invasion, USA.

"It's K-K-K-Ken c-c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me!" ~ Otto (Kevin Klein) in A Fish Called Wanda.

"Do you see that road over there? Yes. Well... pay no attention to it a'tall. It'll do you no good!" Sean Thornton (John Wayne) getting directions from a helpful Irish train conductor in The Quiet Man.

"Guards! ... Knights! ... Squires! ... Prepare for battle" ~ Sir Kay (Niall O'Brien) in Excalibur.

"Leave the gun. Take the cannoli." ~ Pete Clemenza (Richard Castellano) in The Godfather.

[In heavily accented French] "We're so poor, we can't even afford our own language! We all talk like Maurice Chevalier! Haw, haw, haw!!" ~ Some impoverished peasant in History of the World, Part I.

[Sgt Maj Hafner holds up two severed American heads] "Anyone know who these belong to? This is Corporal Miller. He's dead. Hell, the whole gun crew's dead!! And to add insult to injury, Charlie took the fifty-f*****g caliber machine gun with him! I don't have any respect for Corporal Miller anymore, because he allowed his troops to relax. They let their guard down for five f*****g minutes, and Charlie took advantage of it. Look at 'em, God*****t! Pay attention. Stay alert! Stay alive! It's as simple as that!" ~ Yet again, Sgt Maj Hafner (R. Lee Ermey) gives a motivational speech to the troops on the importance of being alert in The Siege of Firebase Gloria. (I find this one to be particularly funny because it's real-life, typical Marine Corps gallows humor. Yes, we really do say things like this)

Can anyone think of any more that are Bloglodyte worthy?

12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.

George S. Patton (George C. Scott) in Patton

8:04 AM  
Blogger Paul, just this guy, you know? said...

You know, I was thinking about that holy water line from The Quiet Man and wondering what you thought of it just the other day.

Here are my nominees:

"Do you not know the truth when you hear it?" ~ Robert Roy MacGregor (Liam Neason) to the Marquis of Montrose (John Hurt) in Rob Roy.

"Oh, King eh? An 'ow'd you get that? By exploiting the workers! By 'anging onto outdated imperialist dogmas!" ~ A peasant (Michael Palin) to King Arthur (Graham Chapman) in Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"I don't believe in the no-win situation." ~ Admiral James T. Kirk (William Shatner) in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

"It might be worse." "How?" "It might be raining." (Sound of thunder as rain begins.) ~ Igor (Marty Feldman) and Frankenstein (Gene Wilder) in Young Frankenstein

"It'll be a slaughter!" "That's the spirit!" ~ Alex (Lance Guest) and Grig (Dan O'Herlihy) in The Last Starfighter

"Cease the knocking of thy craven knees!" ~ Don Quixote (Peter O'Toole) to a dozen or so muleteers who are surrounding him.

Hey, this is fun! A couple more:

"You mean you could have taken your hand out of that handcuff at any time?!" "Not at any time; only if it was funny!" ~ Eddie Valiant (Bob Hoskins) and Roger Rabbit in Who Framed Roger Rabbit

"The show must... you know!" "Go on!" Mr. Henslowe (Geoffrey Rush) and Will Shakespeare (Joseph Fiennes) in Shakespeare In Love

10:02 AM  
Blogger Mac McLernon said...

I haven't got a movie quote, but on a pilgrimage to Knock, on a day trip out, our coach driver leaned out of his cab to ask directions as roadworks had closed his intended route...

"Ah to be sure," came the puzzled reply, "if I wanted to get to there, I wouldn't be starting from here..."

(you really couldn't make this stuff up!)

10:25 AM  
Blogger Anita Moore said...

Well, how about these three colorful put-downs from The D.I., starring Jack Webb:

"Did your mother ever have any children that lived?"

"You're about as useful as a trap-door in a canoe!"

"If your brains were dynamite, you couldn't blow your nose!"

3:35 PM  
Blogger Anita Moore said...

Oh, and then there's Clint Eastwood in Heartbreak Ridge:

"I'll make life-takers and heartbreakers out of 'em, sir!"

"The Marine Corps is looking for a few good men. Unfortunately, you ain't it!"

By the way:

*BEGIN SHAMELESS PLUG*

Check out my post on our Medal of Honor priests.

*END SHAMELESS PLUG*

4:12 PM  
Blogger Rick Lugari said...

I really liked that you had the "K-K-K-Ken" one...the Otto and K-k-ken thing is what made that movie entertaining. The "how much wood would would a woodchuck chuck part had me in tears.

Anyway, how 'bout Clint Eastwood in Sudden Impact: "Go ahead, make my day."

Monty Python is good for a great many, but my all-time favorite is the pansy-ass French soldier yelling the insult, "I fart in your general direction." Classic!

6:31 PM  
Blogger Fr. Erik Richtsteig said...

From "Army of Darkness": Now listen up, you primitive screwheads. See this? This... is my boomstick! The 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about $109.95. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You *got* that?

From 'Die Hard': Yippee-ki-yay, m***********r.

7:14 PM  
Blogger Paul, just this guy, you know? said...

Oh, the Extraordinary Wife slugged me for forgetting this one:

"Hallo! My name is Indigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." ~ Indigo (Mandy Patinkin) in The Princess Bride

7:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Right turn Clyde." -Clint Eastwood as Philo Beddoe.

"They may take our lives, but they'll never take our freedom!" -Mel Gibson as William Wallace

Dr. Eric

9:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I coulda sworne there wuz a kraut behind that cow..Call the cooks"

Willie and Joe, "Up Front"


IR

4:32 PM  
Blogger hooligan said...

"End? No, the journey doesn't end here. Death is just another path... One that we all must take."

Gandalf to Pippin in The Return of the King"

4:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

“What we got here is failure to communicate”
Struthers Martin, “Cool Hand Luck”

“It’s good to be the king!”
Mel Brooks, “History Of The World Part I”

“Flying a plane is no different from riding a bicycle. It’s just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes”
Captain Rex Kramer, “Airplane!”

"This is gonna cause more confusion than a mouse in a burlesque show”
Foghorn Leghorn

12:00 PM  

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