Monday, August 21, 2006

The Theology Of...
Sheesh, what's he thought of this time?

First there was The Theology of Punctuation. Then I gave to the world The Theology of Velcro. Then I gave you The Theology of Victimization. And the last installation was on The Theology of Alfred E. Newman.

I now unleash upon the world... (drum roll)... The Theology of Ostriches. That's right, ostriches. You know, those kooky animals that bury their head in the sand when the going gets tough.

It's bad enough when we have wolves in sheeps clothing (AKA secular-humanists in Roman Collars) scattering the flock and devouring the lambs, but you know... at least we know where they're coming from. And at least they have the 'nads to come right out and say what they're in favor of, even if most of it is flat out heresy.

But then we have those spineless wimps that adhere to The Theology of Ostriches. You know the type... he's the priest that knows damn good and well that some gal left her husband and is now shackin' up, but still has her do The Readings at Mass and take Holy Communion. The T of O priest won't stand up to her (or her well heeled family). It's easier to bury his head in the sand.

He's the pastor of a large (money-maker parish) who caves-in to powerful (ie: rich) parishioners who hate the young, new assistant pastor who just arrived because he actually preaches about nasty things like Death, Judgment, Heaven and Hell. Hmmm... what to do? Piss off the rich folks and watch the money dry-up, or shit-can the new kid who actually conducts himself like a Catholic priest? You can guess what the T of O pastor will do. Let's all wave bye-bye to the new priest who just got transferred to the ecclesiastical version of Siberia.

She's new principal of a supposed "Catholic" elementary school, who quickly discovers the 'open secret' in the school. Namely that there is a flaming homosexual "couple" on staff, thus exposing them in a Catholic school setting to impressionable Catholic children. The T of O principal won't stand up to them or their champion, the parish priest. It's easier to bury her head in the sand.

As soon as controversy looms on the horizon, you can bet your paycheck that the morally castrated Theology of Ostriches bunch will turn as lukewarm as the fluid that Jesus said we should vomit from our mouths.

By the way, if you're wondering if the three examples I gave are situations I actually experienced.... what do you think? *evil grin*

4 Comments:

Blogger Christine said...

Unreal...priest like that will have a lot to answer for before God.

Did you hear about Chaminade?
My brother went to that school...almost 30 years ago...and they just fired a secretary for having an affair with a married staff member.

She is suing, but it doesn't look like she has much standing.
(Maybe cause she is used to being horizontal? LMAO)

9:47 PM  
Blogger Chad said...

Ouch. I think I know what you're referring to in example #2.
If it's who I think it is, said young priest actually had the parish's sanctus bells hidden from him so he couldn't use them in a Mass. But then again, there could be more than one young, orthodox priest banished to the boondocks...

Our poor bishop.

10:24 PM  
Blogger Athanasius contra mundo said...

Theology of the Ostrich (lol)
Its so funny because its so true. And when a priest does take a stance it tends to drive off parishioners, like chaff from the wheat.

6:01 AM  
Blogger Paul, just this guy, you know? said...

My parish is in the boondocks of my diocese, but we don't have a cool, orthodox young priest.

I'm kinda jealous.

9:09 AM  

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