The Crescendo That Ended In A Disappointed Sigh
Snake bit... again

Well, looks as if any freeing of the Traditional Latin Mass won't be happening any time soon. Status quo is the watch-word of the day. The Mass that glorifies God Almighty, strengthens Faith, fosters vocations... that Mass is still by permission only. Oh well, all in God's good time.

But bad theater... and even worse Catholicism is permissible. Here's what I'm talking about;

How I Spent My Easter Vigil

An old family friend was just rcv'd in The Church last night. She asked if my wife and I would attend the Easter Vigil at St. (Missed The) Mark Sorta-Catholic church. To say this place is "liberal" is a masterpiece of understatement. Imagine one of the Protestant Mega-McChurches with a crucifix and the so-called 'Blessed Sacrament Chapel', AKA 'Christ In A Broom Closet', hidden way in the back. I kept wondering why people kept genuflecting as they entered their pews. After all, they sat with their backs to Christ, and genuflected to a man (the priest). It went downhill from there.

Anyhow, I felt like I was ecclesiastically violated. I've seen better organized monkey s***-fights at the zoo.

But where do I begin? Should I start with the priest who kept changing his mind if we should (at the beginning of Mass) stand/sit/go outside/stay inside? Seriously... before Mass it was announced that we 'should all exit the church to process in', then when half the congregation was outside, the good padre corrected himself and said that only the 'RCIA folks' needed to be outside, the rest of us should go back inside. Lots of bumping into and exclamations of "what's going on here!?" as this Chinese Fire Drill unfolded.

That pretty much set the tempo for the evening.

Should I talk of the choir that consisted of 18 acoustic guitars, one drum set, and a real hep-cat cool dude with a casio sound machine? Speaking of such... last night we heard 'hymns' that were cha-cha flavored, Negro Spirituals (complete with wailings and 'AMENS' from the lily white choir), and other toe-tappers that must have originally been done by the Vince Guiraldi Trio (you , know... the 'Charlie Brown' theme music).

Oh, and before I forget... one git-picker in the choir kept throwing his arm up during the Hit Parade. Our very own Pete Townsend? I half expected them to break into a Mike Curb Congregation inspired (and really crappy) version of "Baba O'Reilly". There was one "hymn" that I SWEAR was based on the old Herb Alpert song "This Guy". You know, "you see dis guy, dis guys in luv wid youuuuuuuu...". I guess they were singing about Jesus.

Ohhhh.... and the multitude of laity that kept the conga line going to the podium for Readings. If I used the phrase "drama queens and over-the-top bad acting"... would that paint a mental picture?

And should I bring up the worn-out old dyke dressed up an awful lot like a priest that sat conspicuously close to the good old Padre during Mass? And not one single altar boy.... but 6 altar girls. But hey, why should any boy desire to serve at the alter? That's a girl thing. Anyone remember the old saying "the cradle of vocations is at the foot of the altar"? And no one in the hierarchy can figure out why we have empty seminaries. At least in the Novus Ordo... Traditional seminaries have waiting lists.

Anyhow, twice during Mass, I actually laughed out loud. It was all just soooo...... INSIPID! But around hour #2 I actually started to get really pissed. Things went from the mildly amusing and confusing, to absurd, to outright disrespectful and irreverent. Entertainment value at a minimum... The Glorification of Man at a maximum. It was glaringly obvious that Horizontal Worship was the order of the day.

I should be happy. At least I don't have to go to Mass there Easter morning with the kiddies. Dancing... bunny costumes... the works. More entertainment.

Well, I have to go now. I have the uncontrollable urge to shower and scrub-down with steel wool until my skin bleeds.

Happy Easter!

PS, I over heard a Protestant visitor say after Mass "that was just like our services!".

'Nuff said.