Saturday, April 18, 2009

Pirates? What Pirates?
Other than the butt pirate to the right

Silly us. And how lucky we are to have the none-too-manly Johann Hari illuminating all us'n redneck inbreds that there really aren't any pirates... just freedom fighting fisherman banding together to repel evil Western poachers and nuclear waste dumpers.

Here's some of the alleged "news" article as reported by The Huffington Post, San Francisco Bay View and The Independent (UK); You Are Being Lied to About Pirates
By Johann Hari

In 1991, the government of Somalia - in the Horn of Africa - collapsed. Its 9 million people have been teetering on starvation ever since - and many of the ugliest forces in the Western world have seen this as a great opportunity to steal the country’s food supply and dump our nuclear waste in their seas.

Yes: nuclear waste. As soon as the government was gone, mysterious European ships started appearing

This is the context in which the men we are calling "pirates" have emerged. Everyone agrees they were ordinary Somalian fishermen who at first took speedboats to try to dissuade the dumpers and trawlers, or at least wage a 'tax' on them. They call themselves the Volunteer Coastguard of Somalia.
Dear Volunteer Coastguard of Somalia,
I hope you found the most recent encounter with the Volunteer Navy of the United States of America educational and beneficial to your future endeavors.

Hugs and kisses all around,

Vir Speluncae Catholics
MSgt USMC (ret)
Caveman Extraordinaire
All Around Swell Guy

9 Comments:

Blogger chestertonian said...

I love how Rush calls the pirates, "merchant marine organizers."

9:34 AM  
Blogger Fr. Erik Richtsteig said...

Must be hard for this guy to breathe with his head so far up his posterior.

12:28 PM  
Blogger Subvet said...

"Must be hard for this guy to breathe with his head so far up his posterior."

Breathe hell, unless theres a plate glass window in his stomach he'll never see where he's going!

12:56 PM  
Blogger Adeodatus49 said...

It will take more than three full metal jackets for the Somalis (pirates and their clans) to get the point. E.g., blowing mother ships and speed boats out of the water . . . for a start.

1:38 PM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Orthodoxae said...

We shoot merchant marine organizers. As for anal merchant marine organizer, they shoot themselves.

1:49 PM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Catholicus said...

Adeo,
You're absolutely right. 3 whacked bad guys far from ends the problem.

But it does set a rather nice precedence.

2:11 PM  
Blogger Bill Hoog said...

At one time the Brits used to hang them, didn't they?

3:42 PM  
Blogger Fr. Erik Richtsteig said...

So did we Bill.

8:20 PM  
Blogger Al said...

By Hari's definition those guys at Tripoli were merely tax collectors as well?

I am getting sick & tired of people making excuses for criminal activity because they hate the USA & are cheering for the enemy.

7:48 AM  

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