Monday, November 13, 2006

Lady Elton Mad At Religion
So what?
WARNING!!! This is REALLY crude. If you find bathroom humor to be insulting, don't read this post.

Well, well, well... Sir Prancelot, better known to the rest of us mere mortals as Elton John, wants religion banned completely.

I couldn't help myself. So without further adieu... I give to you -

An Ode To Elton
(to the tune of Rocket Man)

He packed my chute last night - real tight
Rearward power, loose B.M.
And I'm gonna be wearing my Depends by then
I crap my pants so much, but it's all right
Hope I don't contract AIDS
Now that would really bite

And I think I'm gonna blame the Pope in Rome
For teaching men ought not duel bone to bone
Do colonoscopies really make me groan?

Oh no, no, no, I'm a Sphincter Man
Sphincter Man, reaming out his bomb bay doors, they're blown

Gay ain't the kind of life if you want kids
It seems we've hit a glitch
And the fun to make you my lil' prison bitch
This sudden weight loss, I don't understand
My bunghole bleeds, I'm feeling weak

A Sphincter Man, a Sphincter Man
I'm a Sphincter Man...

3 Comments:

Blogger Christine said...

Thank God I wasn't drinking anything when I read that! It would have ruined my computer! LMAO! absolutely your best!

10:50 PM  
Blogger Angela Messenger said...

HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have sent a link to friends.

1:04 PM  
Blogger Gaufridus said...

Very interesting...

I wonder if "Sir" Elton John understands that his knightly title ("sir") is derived from a thoroughly Christian -- and therefore Catholic -- custom.

Before this asshole bandit shoots his mouth off anymore, perhaps he should renounce his title and move to a non-Christian country (say, Iran, for instance) and call for the abolition of religion.

Pax tecum.

1:57 PM  

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