Saturday, September 30, 2006

Gee Doc, But I've Never Felt Better
I never even knew I was sick

According to "Rev." Laurie Hays Coffman, pastorette and head Poncho Lady-in-charge of her own little Faith Community & Express Lane To Hell, otherwise known as Calvary United Methodist Church of Durham, NC, is committed to full inclusion of all people, particularly gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgender people, and to publicizing itself this way.

Fine, if she insists upon turbo-charging her trip to The Lower Rings, that's her call. But what I find amusing is her own description of the type of folks who commiserate with her and her posse of Fruits and Nuts.

"We are black and white, old and young, American and international, gay and straight, lesbian, transgender, bisexual, recovering Catholics and fundamentalists, unchurched, dechurched, rechurched, liturgical, sacramental and young families with children."

"Recovering"? (I just love those 'tolerant' liberals)

Ohhh... I get it. If I actually agree with what Sacred Scriptures states about sodomy, AND if I happen to disagree with Poncho Lady Coffman's twisting of same Sacred Scriptures, then I'm obviously sick and in desperate need of "recovery".

Is it just me, or is this broad pretty twisted? But then again, she considers some guy sloshing his penis around in another dude's feces filled colon to be "normal".

Silly me.

5 Comments:

Blogger Former Altar Boy said...

"Recovering Catholic" is the new and popular name the fallen away use to identify themselves. In the past they were honest enough to say they had "left the Church" or call themselves Protestants. Interestly, most of these so-called "recovering Catholics" were never very Catholic to begin with (blame it on the poor catechisis of the post-Vatican II "springtime")and end up practicing no religion at all ("I don't like all the rules" or "I don't believe in 'organized' religion")

9:50 PM  
Blogger Angry Orthodox said...

I must be sick too Cavey. After all I keep getting sent to "diversity training" and stuff.

As for recovering catholic tag, that one I can understand, if one is recovering from the "community, kickin' back, poncho lady, haugen and haas, Cardinal Mahoney" type chrisitanity we've seen since V2 -the ones who drove away into atheism in the first place;
or the other extreme, the sedevacantist, borgian, types who dress up like devils and scare kids so bad that they piss themselves, and dress up like St. Nick and whack kids with belts like Classy Freddie Blassy talked about in his book. If anyone did that to my kid I'd beat the S*** out of them where they stood.

So what this poncho lady is saying that the bible is wrong and that the church is wrong because of a few bad apples? I see that too often. I've met her type too often as well. The last was when I was in a show (a musical) and after wrap we returned a borrowed keyboard from a fellow cast ladies "interfaith church" where she's a "minister". One guy with us asked what her "reverend" teaches and she said elements of Judaism and Gnosticism. I bit my tongue for the sake of being brought back to my car.

9:55 PM  
Blogger Christine said...

If being Catholic is wrong...I don't want to be right.

LMAO

10:28 PM  
Blogger Kasia said...

"Recovering Catholic" isn't new - I heard it in the church I grew up in, some 20 years ago. What IS new is that the "tolerant" bigots who use it are now widely affecting the culture at large.

2:59 PM  
Blogger miss cole said...

It had not occured to me that the term "recovering catholic" was derogatory. I don't know why it didn't because it so clearly implys that there might be anything wrong with being catholic. There are people in every kind of church who unfortunately use their religion to hurt rather than to enable others to grow closer to God. This is a human failing, not a Catholic one. I do not wish to have my relationship with God critized or questioned by others. I whole heartedly apologize for having questioned yours by having overlooked how the term "recovering catholic" could be hurtful. please forgive me.

May the peace of Christ be with you

Miss Cole
member, Calvary United Methodist Church

1:43 PM  

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