Thursday, December 10, 2009

The Truth About Tiger Woods That No One Will Come Out And Say
Except the Cavemen

WARNING! Harsh Language Alert!


Now I see that the reason one Eldrick "Tiger" Woods has been doing more nailing than a station wagon full of illegal alien construction workers. It's because he's a 'sex addict'.

WHAT!!?? Look at this guy! 'Eldrick' is right. This guy's the textbook definition of "nerd". He couldn't get any geekier if he tried.

Gang, let's be honest -- Tiger Woods couldn't get laid in prison.

Does anyone honestly think if Eldrick Woods was just some schmuck working at MacDonald's, that some hot Swedish bikini model would give him a second look, more or less even acknowledge his basic humanity? Hell, no.

Cary Grant, he ain't. More like Harry Carey.

"Sex addict", my dyin' ass. Eldrick is jumping in the sack with every smokin' hot babe because he's rich. Period, end of story. Ain't it amazing what a gazillion dollars in your checking account can do? From doofus to dreamboat in one easy lesson.

But leave it to this 'it's not my fault' culture we live in. Tiger Woods isn't to blame or held responsible for what he's done wrong. No personal accountability, and certainly no remorse required. After all, he's a victim... he's sick.

Such bullshit.

25 Comments:

Blogger Mary Rose said...

Oh, my gosh... was seriously laughing at loud at this one! I thought pretty much the same thing. I never thought he was "good-looking" and would roll my eyes when he was described as such. Denzel Washington, he ain't.

But still, there was a certain charm and "respectful, clean-cut appeal" that was marketed to the masses and I for one, believed it. When the sordid tale about a mistress broke, I felt badly for his wife and children. When women started crawling out of the woodwork, I was angry.

It's unbelievable how badly this guy failed. How many men would give almost anything to have a smokin' hot Swedish model for a wife? That's one thing. But as soon as you bring children into it, the game changes forever. Woods to me is a scumbag, period. Somehow he missed the "until death do us part" bit in the marriage vows. His choices were deliberate and fully belonged to him.

I also have no mercy for the skanks who happily accepted the invitations from his wingmen/bodyguards. They knew he was married but hey - he's rich, so who cares? Disgusting. Their self-loathing has only contributed to the definition of gold-digger.

For an excellent perspective on this, check out The American Thinker's piece, Tiger, Barack, and the Law of Transitivity. Talk about nailing the truth.

5:41 AM  
Blogger Former Altar Boy said...

I assume all his opponents on the golf course will be watching Woods, and his scorecard, a bit more closely from now on, too. Any guy who cheats on his wife will cheat at other things, too...golf, cards, you name it.

8:11 AM  
Blogger Cliff said...

Mary Rose made some good comments, but got one small detail wrong. Logically, having made a prenup agreement, there was no "until death do us part" in their vows.

8:11 AM  
Blogger Mary Rose said...

Former Alter Boy, I agree. Years ago, I wrote a letter to our daily paper's editor about Richard "Dick" Celeste when it was discovered he cheated on his wife. My reasoning was: if a politician cheats on his wife, why won't he cheat the American people? It's another reason why I loathed Clinton.

I just posted a blog entry, Fear and Loathing in Bimboland: Tiger Woods' Harem. I wanted to explore a little more the topic of women who sleep with married men.

Just a sad tale, all around.

9:19 AM  
Blogger TCN said...

The women should be pilloried, too. What a bunch of losers.

Let's pray they crawl back to the Grace of God.

9:55 AM  
Blogger Adeodatus49 said...

How many men would give almost anything to have a smokin' hot Swedish model for a wife?

You mean a trophy wife? Any man (or woman for the female counterpart, a trophy husband) going for one of these deserves what he gets. If she/he is all trophy then she/he will be a major disappointment about two weeks after the fun-filled initial sexual days of the marriage [I got the two weeks time criterion from my TLM priest].

I prefer to concentrate on Tiger Woods, the golf athlete and superstar. I leave his private life alone. Everything we have seen before the scandal and subsequent to it is media hype, promotion, advertising, and almost total bull sh*t.

BTW, I don't approve of his lifestyle at all. I predict his children will be the biggest loses. Don't know about his wife; maybe she too, i.e., if she if she didn't go after him as a trophy husband. Hmmmh . . . .

11:40 AM  
Blogger Unfinished said...

How many men would give almost anything to have a smokin' hot Swedish model for a wife?

Not that I am married, but the beautiful, perfect 10s are always the most difficult to live with.

I mean, if everyone had been drooling all over you since you were 14, wouldn't you have developed a sense of entitlement?

With that said, Tiger learned a valuable lesson - money can't buy happiness, but it can sure as hell rent it for a while.

12:21 PM  
Blogger bilbannon said...

All women...Elin included... actually have to look partly...partly... for money acquisition in a male for the sake of future children and bringing them to term with someone working while the woman does bring the baby to term....(remember "partly").
Men can be less money oriented by the nature of things and Woods was.
Elin's parents were divorced and so it would incline her to look for more material security than average. And Tiger seemed wonderful family-wise to her as he did to all due to his close and poignant relationship to his father.

So she saw family man and money and a body that is not that of a typical geek. Hugh Hefner's pathetic case is more to the point of women digging money only and being able to avoid prostitution indictment by living with him in a mansion rather than in a mobile home. But the ordinary woman must consider money a little.

Thus in the Bible when Abraham sends the servant to find a bride for Isaac, money is part of the reality: Gen 24:53 "And the servant brought forth jewelry of silver and of gold, and raiment, and gave them to Rebekah; he also gave to her brother and to her mother costly ornaments."

That is why if our daughters run off with carnival carnies from a traveling circus troupe, we are saddened...unless it is Cirque du Soleil and the guy is knocking down a 120K a year with medical and dental and pet insurance for the dog.
Tiger's mother is one of the chief victims of Satan in all this. Her reality of being a grandmother may vanish if Elin divorces and custody is without question hers... and Tiger's mother's concept of her son's innocence and of the family she watched over is totally robbed from her. She is late in life and as a woman has now lost all that is real in life unless she has religious faith and if she does not have that, Tiger's mother is hurting deeply and without hope.
And the media though does not recognize family and the elderly as a concern because we do not really have a culture but a too free marketplace that passes for culture and supports bad news as more sensational and more profit for ratings. The devil has produced a masterpiece in all this
and its damage to adoring children who have his poster on their wal and who will then read these text messages that Tiger has yet to deny...the damage is astounding.
God however can bring a more astounding good out of this IF we pray and IF unlike Judas, the actors all do His will in the next stage. If that fails, God will still work His greater good but in secret rather than in public.

12:39 PM  
Blogger Lola said...

John Daly is looking more like a role model every day.

I just have a hard time with all these "addictions". Physiological addictions aside, it seems most people get into 'bad' habits. Maybe some need mental health help, and medication such as Horders.

But, what I see is someone who is lost. Terribly lost. And, I bet, if Earl Woods were alive he'd have hit his son upside the head.

"Trophy Wife" aside. The lady didn't go after him. Or so I've heard. The lady is a person. The problem with a pornographic view of the world is that when Elin voices an opinion, or is a flesh and blood person, she ceases to be an object. She ceases to be easy.

BTW I'm not surprised that all this finally came 'out'.

I was told by a retired RCMP that often people think what they do is a secret. They think co-workers, neighbors, friends don't notice something is up. I think many people around Tiger knew what was up even if Elin didn't.

Lots of people made money off his 'image'. They had a reason to protect it.

If he doesn't get one more 'endoresment' he'll be still financially set than many men who work honestly and with high standards in their respective fields.

2:17 PM  
Blogger VSO said...

Reminds me of a line from "Revenge of the Nerds." It was said by Robert Carradine: "All jocks think about is sports. All nerds think about is sex."

Agree with you Addy except for one exception, according to my trophy wife I'M a trophy husband.

2:59 PM  
Blogger Lola said...

Unfinished: You're partly right.

Although some of our greatest saints were drool worthy as far as looks go. St. Therese, St. Gemma, Pier Georgio...

But, I did once have a neighbor lady who was a "smokin' Hot" "blond" and he was a tubby neighborhood business owner. After they got married and started arguing, I started singing "Never make a pretty woman your wife - Listen to my point of view get an ugly girl to marry you!"

That got a LOT of laughs.

6:28 PM  
Blogger bilbannon said...

I would add on the looks thing that gorgeous women often (not always...Angelina Jolie) are not interested in looks especially if the looks will upstage them. The really good looking actors like Claude Van Damme and the guy who played American Ninja years ago are not discussed by women and would make a lot of women feel inferior in that one area that is supposed to belong to their gender.
That is why Richard Gere was considered handsome and talked of by women: he is not actually good looking but he is rugged looking instead and thus does not compete with a woman the way Van Damme or that black guy on Criminal Minds would compete with them in the area of strict facial aesthetics.

8:03 PM  
Blogger Former Altar Boy said...

The term "trophy wife" usually applies to the second, younger wife a guy marries after dumping trhe wife of his youth that stayed with him while he made his climb in the workaday world and often bore his children as well.

Who can fault Tiger for being attracted to a beautiful woman? (I was.) I know nothing about Mrs. Woods' personality and while, in general, the old song line about "never making a pretty woman your wife," is supported by a lot of history, I think it is unfair to paint every beautiful woman as some mindless gold-digger. I know there is a woman at my parish, a wife, mother (more than twice), and well-educated that seems to be a very devout and loyal Catholic for whom even my pastor used the word "stunning" when he tried to describe her to me.

Also, who says the pre-nup was her idea? More likely it was Tiger's, his agent's, and/or his lawyer's.

I pray both Tiger and Elin turn to Christ and His forgiveness to heal their marriage.

10:05 PM  
Blogger Adeodatus49 said...

Question: What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?

Answer: Santa always stops after three Ho's.

Yep! The inevitable jokes are gearing up to high speed. Letterman does NOT get credit for this one. Jay Leno does!

10:26 PM  
Blogger pinkmonkeybird said...

I may be in the minority on this, but I feel sorry for Tiger. I don't buy the whole "disease" thingie defense, either. But unfortunately, we live in a society today where it is difficult to find a rudder and a compass with which to navigate.
Tiger Woods fell into a deep pit. He failed and he disappointed millions of people and now he is miserably unhappy.
If only a close friend could have approached him before he got deep and converted him to be a devout Catholic.
Sigh.

2:23 AM  
Blogger Confiteor said...

pinkmonkeybird -

I agree with you. My first reaction to hearing this news on Tiger (and I am a PGA golf fan, not necessarily a Tiger fan) was pity.

And I think it is the height of hypocrisy for all these Godless corporations to be pulling their endorsement deals from him. Multi-national corporations by and large promote far worse ills in society than anything Tiger has done by what is tantamount to a common human failing. Tiger just had the money and the access to do what your average mid-30's American male (or female for that matter) would do if given equal time, money, and opportunity. To my knowledge, Tiger has never benefited from having the light of the Catholic Faith to guide him and as a result, he has had a huge fall. That is indeed something to be pitied.

3:11 PM  
Blogger Coffee Catholic said...

I'm so glad I wasn't born pretty but plain instead. Not only because it kept me from becoming all vain about myself... but imagine how hard it must be to be a "stunning" woman. Does she ever get treated like more then a sexy object?? I have a friend that is drop-dead gorgeous but she was such a good, sweet lady. The men hounded and hounded and hounded her and she was miserable!!

4:19 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

How we love to see them fall from the heights. Nothing seems to bring everyone out like the king with no clothes. Jesus had probably had his fill of this part of our human nature when he said he who is without sin cast the first stone. I think that was for adultery as well. Wasn't she caught in the act kind of like Tiger. I use to cheer when Tiger would get beat by the underdog because he was clearly the best that there ever was in that tought sport. I admired him for his life in his foundation and the way he seemed to conduct his life starting with the love he obviously had for his father.

I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their bones:
So let it be with Caesar.

I would hate to see my sin, my weakness, at the mercy of the media for all to see. Yes, he was stupid and it appears he had little control of his urges. My stones have been thrown too often in life and seldom given me much pleasure after the fact. We have a right to get after those who strive to hold office where they have the power to impact our lives or our country. But a golfer? Will all our attention and jokes and attacks be good for his marriage or his children. Google last forever. I heard someone today speak passionately about the children and then spend the next five minutes trashing their father. I grew up in an era of sports stars who led lives that were kept quiet. We had hero's. Shoeless Joe..say it ain't so..
At a time when we need hero's and role models for many troubled youth of color, we should mourn when one falls.

9:04 PM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Catholicus said...

Pardon me, Joe, if I fail to weep alligator tears for this multi-millionaire who thinks he's above his wedding vows.

And BTW, don't all of the young deserve positive role models, and not just " many troubled youth of color"?

Guess not.

11:10 PM  
Blogger pinkmonkeybird said...

I'm not sure what "truth" about Tiger it is that no one will speak. Is it that he prefers blonde trophy women? Is it, as SC claims, that he's only getting sex because he can afford it? Is it that somehow Tiger is not black enough?

I think that people are so busy seeing the forest, they can't see the tree.
A work associate commented to me recently that he has no pity for Tiger because of his insatiable craving for so many affairs. He said, "Hey, come on, we all have an affair here or there. One affair is normal. But now Tiger's number 11 has come forward. How many of these women will there be?"

Well now, that attitude is just sad, imho. Marriage is sacred. Having one affair is an abomination against God.

Tiger is only a man. He has been worshiped and has been given everything that our sick culture values; Daily pleasure, money, adulation, fame.
It is equally sad that the media focuses on Tiger's fall.
Tiger's personal tragedy is not unique. Most of us have the same constitution that would bring us down. That's why we need Our Blessed Mother, the Church and the love of Jesus Christ, Our Lord.

BTW, I'm reminded of a terrific South Park episode that speaks to this..."Britney's New Look"

"Sanguis bibimus, corpus edimus, tolle corpus Satani"

9:37 AM  
Blogger Adeodatus49 said...

Look, his personal character defects and pecadillos aside, this is just another media-induced circus. By now, people ought to know better than to make tin gods out of our media-contrived heroes. IMHO, real heroes don't want the public adulation in the first place. So let's not give it to them who deserve and definitely deny it to the "genuine imitation leather" plastic ones.

Yeah, I know the bit about role models for children, etc. That's what parents are for. A good couple (i.e., Mom & Dad) can go along away to off-set the failures of big personalities who influence our children. (My wife and I have personal experience with this.) And that includes media heroes--Catholic bishops too! [Sorry. I just had to get that shot in!]

10:09 AM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Catholicus said...

PMB,
A couple of things you brought up -

1. I'm not sure what "truth" about Tiger it is that no one will speak.

2. Is it that somehow Tiger is not black enough?


To answer #1, I've already stated that on the OP - But leave it to this 'it's not my fault' culture we live in. Tiger Woods isn't to blame or held responsible for what he's done wrong. No personal accountability, and certainly no remorse required. After all, he's a victim... he's sick.

And in regards to #2, why is race being brought into this? BTW, he's half-Black.

10:33 AM  
Blogger pinkmonkeybird said...

VSC.
Well, you're right, of course. The "Society made me do it" excuse is kind of like the "poverty in a welfare state" mentality. First we relax all the rules and then we take responsibility away from the individual and then no one is accountable and we all slip into Sodom and Gommorah.
Did you know that the stigma of food stamps is going away now? I'm sure you do. You probably blogged about it.

Okay...the race thing.
Once again, you're right, my friend. But the media (Eugene Robinson, for one) can't help themselves and want to talk about that, as well. Rush has been hinting that they are all waiting for him to talk about it so they can brand him as a racist.

I agree with you. Race is not a factor....yet, people talk about it.

Somehow, we've got to get back to becoming a culture of life that respects family and moral values. One way of doing that is to strengthen personal responsibility.

I am reminded of my daily prayer in my 1962 Roman Missal;

ACT OF ADORATION
"...I will turn away my eyes that they may not see vanity..."

I wrestle with that one. I want to call out vanity. But it seems that Christ calls us to look away and not see it.

3:03 PM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Catholicus said...

PMB,
I wrestle with that one. I want to call out vanity. But it seems that Christ calls us to look away and not see it.


From your lips to God's Ears! Excellent ComBox posting! Please keep 'em coming.

3:37 PM  
Blogger Joe of St. Thérèse said...

He went to Stanford, probably too busy "studying" to get any...

8:26 PM  

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