The Lair of the Catholic Caveman

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Thursday, January 01, 2009

On the First Day of 2009
by Simplex Vir (to the tune of 12 days of Christmas)

On the first day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
Barrack Obama in the White House.

On the second day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
two liberal preistesses. and .........

On the third day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
three reasons why we should not kneel, ..........

On the fourth day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
four sandled jesuits, .........

On the fifth day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
five misinterpretations of the GIRM,........

On the sixth day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
six contribution envelopes for ACORN, .........

On the seventh day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
seven earth worshiping liturgists, ..........

On the eight day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
eight examples of cowardice, ..........

On the ninth day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
nine new cafegymatoriums, ..........

On the tenth day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
ten new feast days for social justice, ..........

On the eleventh day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
eleven new prayers for climate change, ...........

On the twelth day of 2009, my USCCB gave to me;
twelve reasons to shut the bums down.......

Yes folks thats right we have another year to look forward to these wayward lads!

posted by Simplex Vir at 1:11 AM

7 Comments:

Blogger TCN said...

I couldn't agree more, but, how do we go about shutting them down?

11:41 AM  
Blogger Adrienne said...

Spot on. After coming from having to the worst music ever at a Mass, I needed some humor.

1:40 PM  
Blogger VSO said...

Good Simple Guy, but it doesn't quite fit the music. ;-)

4:32 PM  
Blogger Simplex Vir said...

VSO, the USCCB doesn't quite fit anything so it is appropo!

8:38 PM  
Blogger Little Ferret said...

You made a sick Ferret LOL!

12:36 AM  
Blogger Al said...

Only 12 reasons to shut them down?

6:24 AM  
Blogger CarpeNoctem said...

Uhh, Simplex... great work, but haven't you heard? There aren't twelve days of Christmas anymore. We transfer the feast of Epiphany to the Sunday between January 2 and 8, giving us anywhere between 8 and 14 days of Christmas... this year only 11.

It would be fun to come up with an extra two for years when we have a late Epiphany...

2:09 AM  

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