Tuesday, October 10, 2006

But What Does It All MEAN!!??
...and other pressing questions pertaining to life

I recently posted a little graphic of the awards I received while serving in the Marine Corps. One of my good goombas e-mailed me asking what all that gobbelty-gook meant.

So here ya go, folks... reading top to bottom, left to right, senior to junior. And a short commentary from me explaining what the decoration was really presented for;

1. Navy and Marine Corps Achievement Medal - I did my job.
a. Star denoting 2d award - I did my job twice.

2. Navy Unit Commendation - We all did our job.

3. Navy Battle E - While assigned to Sea Duty, we all did our job.

4. Marine Corps Good Conduct Medal - "X" amount of years of undetected crime.
a. One large silver star - denoting many, many years of undetected crime.

5. National Defense Medal - Served during time of war. Be you are Gyreen gunslinger or Air Force cook... everyone got this Cracker Jacks prize.

6. Southwest Asia Service Medal - The Marine Corps equivalent of the "Led Zepplin World Tour '77" t-shirt. It proves I was there.
a. 3 small bronze stars - denote that I was there soooooo long, that I'm still pulling sand out of three different orifices.

7. Sea Service Deployment Ribbon - Same as #6, but without the really cool war stories.

8. Drill Instructor Ribbon - Another Cracker Jacks prize. I don't need some dumb-ass ribbon to remind me that I was a DI.

9. Kuwait Liberation Medal (Saudi Arabia) - The King of Saudi Arabia's little way of saying 'thanks for not letting the Iraqis kick the shit out of us'.

10. Kuwait Liberation Medal (Kuwait) - The Emir of Kuwait's little way of saying 'thanks for not letting the Iraqis kick the shit out of us'.

So there you go, sports fans. As you can see, I'm no John Wayne by any stretch of the imagination. Most of those decorations are pure BS anyways. Hell, the only one I'm really proud of is the Good Conduct (6th award). Do any of you know how hard it is to do 20 years in The Corps and not get caught even once?

Hell, even John Wayne couldn't do that.

14 Comments:

Blogger Fr. Erik Richtsteig said...

Caveman,

Thank you for your service.

8:58 PM  
Blogger Jeff Miller said...

Then there is the Expeditionary Medal. Originally I got three of them while being in the Indian Ocean and each time we had a port call in Mombassa, Kenya so I refer to it as the Mombassa Liberty Medal.

Liberty in Mombassa deserves a medal. It looks like all development stopped in 1950 and I walked through the center of town looking for the center of town.

9:33 PM  
Blogger fidelis servus said...

Outstanding!

9:44 PM  
Blogger Hammerbrecher said...

Haha come on, you can tell us what you "really" did that they didn't see.

10:09 PM  
Blogger rhonda lugari said...

I think those are great medals.
I'm proud of you.
My brother has a few he gave me for safe keeping. That was 10 years ago. Now he wants them back and I don't remember where they are. I might have to have some of yours. Even if they aren't the same kind he received. I'll just act like he's all crazy and can't remember what medals he got.

11:22 PM  
Blogger Tracy said...

Hey, as far as I'm concerned, all Marines *are* John Wayne (not literally, of course, but you get the point). I had the honor of having a young (and handsome!) Marine as my driving instructor during the Summer of '05, and he has since returned to duty in Iraq. Please keep Erik Johnston in your prayers!

By the way, I posted a picture of your favorite girl, Adriana Lima in my Catholic knitting blog, just for cavemen like you. Just a heads-up.

4:28 AM  
Blogger Jonathan Carpenter said...

I love your blog. It is good work for such a illustrious member of Uncle Sam's Misguided Children. Fair Winds and Following Seas from your friendly neighborhood squid.

6:10 PM  
Blogger Jovan-Marya Weismiller, T.O.Carm. said...

Hey Caveman, I just noticed this in your sidebar. Sorry for the delay, but I want to add my thanks for your service. And I DO want to know what you didn't get caught doing!

9:13 PM  
Blogger Colleen said...

ROTFLOL!

6:54 PM  
Blogger marcosandolini333 said...

The red stripe worn on the dress blue uniform of NCO's, the ranks between corporal and master sergeant, represents the blood those ranks shed in the famous battle of Chapultepec "Fortress" in the War with Mexico. The U.S. Marines responded to the whipping they took by killing Mexican children, ages 8 to 15 years old in a fight the next day. President Truman visited the site in 1947 and laid a wreath at the graves of these brave lads.
Nobody pinned a ribbon on their chests. And a real Marine doesn't need Medals, just more ammunition.Some people need false bravado, some people are brave. I'm not going to thank you for joinig the Corps; it was a priveledge for you to be there.And John Wayne was only a Marine in the movies, he never served in any branch.

2:30 PM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Catholicus said...

Oh golly gee.... where to begin the dissection? Oh well, let the history lesson begin;

The red stripe worn on the dress blue uniform of NCO's, the ranks between corporal and master sergeant, represents the blood those ranks shed in the famous battle of Chapultepec "Fortress" in the War with Mexico.
Wrong. It's the ranks between Corporal and Sergeant Major/Master Gunnery Sergeant. 1st Phase Recruits know that. Your very first statement illustrates your ignorance of the subject at hand.

The U.S. Marines responded to the whipping they took by killing Mexican children, ages 8 to 15 years old in a fight the next day. President Truman visited the site in 1947 and laid a wreath at the graves of these brave lads
How could they "take a whipping" when they won the battle? But nonetheless, you're factually incorrect. By the by, of the totality of Mexican forces involved in the Battle of Chapultapec Palace that day, there was a portion thereof who were Mexican Cadets, or "lads" as you call them. I guess your propaganda website didn't point that out to you, huh? But anyhow, yes, some of them were killed. That's usually what happens to folks who are stupid enough to point loaded weapons at US Marines.

Nobody pinned a ribbon on their chests.
That's because they're dead.

And a real Marine doesn't need Medals, just more ammunition.
And you served when? And I couldn't help but laugh when I noticed that you conveniently skipped the part where I typed -"Most of those decorations are pure BS anyways. Hell, the only one I'm really proud of is the Good Conduct (6th award)." Essentially, once you've completed just one enlistment, then you would rate to even have a discussion with me anything concerning being a United States Marine. In the meantime, your opinion on the topic is actually quite meaningless.

Some people need false bravado, some people are brave.
And some really have no idea what they're talking about, but seem to think they're an expert in the field. But I humor them... to a point.

I'm not going to thank you for joinig the Corps;
I don't seem to recall asking for nor requiring your thanks.

it was a priveledge for you to be there.
And for some odd reason I'm suppose to be impressed by you pointing that out to me? Sorry, I'm not.

And John Wayne was only a Marine in the movies, he never served in any branch.
Noooooo..... really? That's the only thing you said correct yet.

4:44 PM  
Blogger 318@NICE said...

When did you serve?
I was in the Marine Corps from 1987 to 1993. I was an 0331 machine gunner in the infantry.
I went to boot camp and infrantry school in California, SanDiego and Camp Pendleton. MY first duty station was Barracks duty in Cuba (that sucked!), but after that year I was sent back to Camp PEndleton and was with 1/1 at Camp Horno. I spent the rest of my time there, I did two west pacs with Desert Storm in between.
Your blog scares me, because I too am a Notre Dame fan and am a Traditional Catholic.

Dave

4:18 PM  
Blogger Vir Speluncae Catholicus said...

Dave,
I was in from '77-'97. Served everywhere from Oki to Kuwait. Did everything from being an Engineer to a stop on DI Duty, to Sea Duty to MCSF Bn (Barracks Duty) and a couple of tours at Leadership Schools.

Needless to say, I miss it terribly.

Semper Fideles, brother!

5:41 PM  
Blogger Jonathan Carpenter said...

Caveman:

How about what John "Abscam" Murtha did to those 8 Marines? Accussed them of committing cold bolded murder in Haditha, Iraq. This despite the fact that 7 of those 8 have been cleared of all charges. On my blog I am have info from a site that seeks to but Murtha out of Congress. I also have a story regarding how one of those Marine's lawyer is considering suing Murtha including the reporter from Time who broke it? What do you think?

http://www.scrappycons.com/2008/06/lawyer-for-haditha-marine-plans-to-sue.html

6:55 PM  

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