Monday, May 29, 2006

Will Kneeling At Mass Send You To Hell?
Yes! According to the Roman Protestant Diocese of Orange County
Hat Tip to PV Deuce

The House Sergeant Major (the wife) and I just got home from quite a long drive to attend a Traditional Latin Mass this fine Memorial Day morn'. So beautiful it was that The Boss was almost moved to tears (how did I ever get lucky enough to have her for a wife?).

Anyhow, no one was smackin' gum, no cell phones going off, no Macarena-esque hand gyrations, no one attired like they were on their way to a BBQ at the beach. Just the absolutely and utterly centuries old, tried and true, reverend, respectful, sacred act of worship to God Almighty. It was all just so.... Catholic.

When we got home, I cut on the 'puter, and what do mine eyes behold? An e-mail concerning the goings on in Orange County, California. They call it "The O.C." (I would guess that must stand for "The Opposite of Catholic"). Get ready for this;

At a small Catholic church in Huntington Beach, the pressing moral question comes to this: Does kneeling at the wrong time during worship make you a sinner?

Kneeling "is clearly rebellion, grave disobedience and mortal sin," Father Martin Tran, pastor at St. Mary's by the Sea, told his flock in a recent church bulletin. The Diocese of Orange backs Tran's anti-kneeling edict... Lesa Truxaw, the Orange Diocese director of worship, said Bishop Tod D. Brown banned kneeling because standing "reflects our human dignity".

The debate is part of the argument among Catholics between tradition and change. Traditionalists see it as the ultimate posture of submission to and adoration of God; modernists view kneeling as the vestige of a feudal past they would like to leave behind.

Hmmm... mortal sin sends one to hell, so all those who have the gall to *GASP!* kneel during the Consecration, they now face everlasting damnation and hellfire? Also, I thought the bishop was the director of worship, some chick in stretch pants. Silly me. And you know, if standing vice kneeling really does "reflects our human dignity", can you imagine how much more solemn and holy the Mass will be if we all do jumping jacks and deep-knee bends?

(In true Marine Corps fashion...)
THE NEXT PRAYER WILL BE SAID WHILE DOING JUMPING JACKS (side straddle hops). IT'S A FOUR COUNT PRAYER. I WILL COUNT THE CADENCE, YOU WILL COUNT THE REPITION... ALL TOGETHER, EXERCISE!! (or should the command be "PRAY!!"?)

6 Comments:

Blogger Former Altar Boy said...

Falling on one's knees in adoration of the One True God will supposedly send one to hell in Orange County? When is the Vatican going to stop Brown (and Mahoney)!!!???

11:13 AM  
Blogger Athanasius contra mundo said...

So I suppose they would be fine with just waving to the tabernacle as you enter a Catholic church. Genuflecting wouldn't refelct human dignity along their lines of thinking.

4:38 PM  
Blogger Former Altar Boy said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

5:59 PM  
Blogger Former Altar Boy said...

NEWS FLASH!
In anticipation of more disobedience from rebel devotion this Christmastide, Bsp. (gag) Brown has banned the words "falls on your knees" from the carol "O Holy Night." Anyone not obeying this episcopal edict will be declared a heretic and excommunicated.

6:00 PM  
Anonymous Angry Orthodox said...

what shullbit! Who does he think he is? Martin Luther? Henry VIII? Man you TRY and stop me from kneeling before the Lord!

7:53 PM  
Anonymous archmich said...

I agree with "angry orthodox", only I just didn't know that martyrdom is coming closer and closer.

8:18 AM  

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